That’s the last of it, probably, right?
Winter’s loosening it’s grip.
It’s not over, but you can feel it in the air. It’s almost over.
There’s still a chill, here, in my kitchen. Winter’s hooks are still right outside the window. I haven’t yet taken my shoes off from outside, for fear my feet would suffer. They take much longer to warm up, now that I’m older.
I’ve been thinking about the internet a lot lately. I’ve had some real, vitriolic haters emerge, lately. Don’t get me wrong — there’s been much much more support and kindness, but a few nasty jerks have reared their heads, too. I’ve gained a lot a friends and lost a few.
That’s to be expected, I guess. But I’ve been thinking about the internet. Guys. What if we’re on the verge of something great here? What if we’re on the precipice of a huge leap forward for humankind? Hear me out on this:
What if humanity is about to move to a more golden age? Look! Dictatorships are toppling across the Middle East. Listen – the democratic murmurs arise from a new, powerful middle class in China. Feel – the stirrings of a new type of human experience – wait, that was just too much kimchee at dinner. But you understand what I’m driving at.
The internet is in its infancy, still. It’s helping to trigger revolutions, not just political ones, but economic and social ones. Look. I’m a grown man simultaneously broadcasting my thoughts on humanity, and pictures of pie, my Japanese little brother, and my butt crack. What I’m clearly trying to say is: Humanity We’ve Arrived.
We’re at that golden age we always dreamed of. All we need is a few more dictators to fall, a few more people to open their hearts, and a few more women elected in the senate. Seriously. They’re under represented. Gays too. Get on board gays, ladies, and gay ladies.
Yes, I’m telling Ellen to run for office.
Pretty soon it won’t be fashionable to hate things online. Pretty soon the world will move beyond that. Toward kindness.
I wonder where that will leave us? What happens when we, as humans, leap forward? I wonder what the haters will do, when it’s not fun and funny to snark it up and look for ways to tear down people they’re jealous of online?
No, fag, I’m not talking about the singularity. Unless, maybe I am? I’m not.
No, wait. I am:
I always thought of the internet as a human scream – the loudest ever heard.
What if that scream is just a symptom of its infancy?
What if it mellows out into a deep hum? What if we take that hum and build off it, until it rises.
Mighty and mature.
A heavenly chorus of voices. All singing at once. What if we become heaven? What if we all become the Horizon?
What if someday we’re so advanced, there’s no need for someone to come and tell us: Enjoy the pie, Jerks?
PIEFOLK 
