Mallory Schlossberg is a writer and performer in New York City. She lives in Brooklyn, and blogs at www.schlossed-by-mallory.tumblr.com. You can follow her on twitter @ malloryschloss.
Me: I have to go after brunch. I have a lot to do. I have to work on my proposal, and I have to read a bunch of books for it.
Him: That makes sense. To compare it to?
Me: Yeah. I mean, but I like the book I’m reading now.
Him: Yeah.
Me: I’ve never had brunch before.
Him: What?
Me: I usually work on the weekends. And I never had somebody to have brunch with before.
Him: Well, baby, you’re havin’ brunch today!
Him: So…what do you like to do in the summers?
Me: Um. . . I don’t know. I mean, last summer I worked on my show a lot. I did it twice.
Him: You don’t like, go to the beach?
Me: Well, I don’t know. The summer to me is just an extension of the rest of the year, except I’m wearing shorts. And I never really had anyone to go with. When I have free time, I take on projects, classes. I work on my show.
Him: I love going to the beach. I went to Fort Tilden last year.
Me: That’s the nude beach.
Him: It is?
Me: Oh! That’s Vampire Weekend.
Him: It is?
Me: Yeah. I was supposed to see them in concert a few years ago, but I got the flu.
Him: They describe themselves as Upper West Side Soweto.
Me: Huh?
Him: Do you know what that is?
Me: No.
Him: It’s South African music. Upper West Side South African. That’s disgusting.
Me: Um, well, I like their music.
Him: So, there’s something that’s been bothering me.
Me: Yeah?
Him: All you ever talk about is work.
Me: What do you mean?
Him: Like. What your’e working on. Your proposal. Your show. Improv. It’s like, all you do.
Me: I mean… I don’t get paid to do what I love. So it doesn’t feel like work. And it’s what I love. It’s what I like to talk about.
Him: But I mean, earlier. You told me you were reading a book for your proposal. Why don’t you instead tell me what the book is about.
Me: Okay. It’s called “My Boyfriend Wrote A Book About Me.” It’s about this woman whose boyfriend wrote a book about her. And then she tells stories about her life post-break up. It’s funny.
Him: See! That’s a conversation! I’m reading a book (I tune out.)
Me: Oh. Wow. Really?
Him: Yeah. I’m enjoying it.
Me: I don’t always talk about work. I work a lot. But it’s not work. I’m bothered that you said that.
Him: Well, I did. And I was really worried about this, but then I saw you and I knew everything was going to be fine.
Me: I love what I do.
Him: And that’s great – but listen. I have passions, too. I moonlight as a video game designer.
Me: I’m not here in New York to teach SAT prep. And you have to realize you met me at a weird time because of the holidays. It’s going to be different soon – I won’t be around as much. I’m a really busy person.
Him: But you do work a lot. And I don’t want it to be – you come home, I come home, we have dinner, and then we have sex. I mean, sex is great, but I’m not going to remember sex. I am going to remember a picnic. I like picnics. Olives, bread. I want to make memories. Go to the park. Go to that movie theater in Dumbo and get a six pack.
Me: I need to get a bike. Want to help me get one?
Him: YES! See, I love that you asked me that.
Me: I also need to get my library card. Wanna come with me?
Him: YES! See, I like this. Doing stuff together.
Me: I’ve never really had someone to do these things with. So I guess I don’t know what I like to do. Besides comedy and art stuff. I’m just not used to this sort of…
Him: Mallory. You’re writing a book about dating OkCupid boys. Now your’e dating a man. Things are different.
Me: I want to go dancing.
Him: Let’s go. Let me get your coat.
Me: (I see someone I know) Hi! How are you! (back to him) That’s someone I know from improv.
Him: Oh. Okay… Cool.
Me: I still don’t like what you said before.
Him: What? I was worried about something, and we talked about it, and I feel so much better about it now. Let’s go. (he takes out his iPhone) I want to take a picture of us and send it to my mom. (Click) Ah, came out too dark.
photos, tri vo
guest edited by samuel lindeman.
PIEFOLK 
Some folks live to entertain themselves. Some folks live to create. Never apologize for not living purely as a consumer… you are a creative soul. it is what makes you interesting. You would get bored quickly if all you did was beach, dinners, movies, concerts… though they are nice distractions. it is a beautiful thing to be passionate about what you love to do.