photos by eryc perez de tagle

My name Crissy and I’ve been reading your blog for sometime now.
I was thinking about sending you an email for some time now and telling you how entertaining I found your blog to be, but I didn’t because I didn’t think you would want to talk to a girl.

However, I was reading your recent post on Danger Pin and it inspired me. I’m 5’10” like Sam and it’s hard being so tall. I own heels but I never wear them because I don’t want to be taller than I already am. Also, people make fun of me because of my height and I wish that I could be shorter sometimes. Recently I’ve been more accepting of my height because of looking at models. Then I read your post and it made me feel even better. So thanks! 😀
Crissy —x

Thanks for writing in, Crissy.  I wouldn’t want to talk to girls?  Nah.  I like girls a bunch.

I think we all have some major body issue to overcome at some point.  Here’s my advice:

Wear your heels.  You’re magnificent and impressive.  The people who don’t think so? They are not your real friends.  Make them jealous….  You are a pretty girl.

Love you.


Michael –

I can honestly say that I am completely addicted to your website for the past couple months. You are fantastic at what you do and to keep me occupied/entertained for more than 5 minutes on the internet without having an urge to go to a new website is practically impossible! After viewing your website, I really hope you can offer some advice to help me.

I come from a suburban area, I’m eighteen and for some reason, I am so scared of being in a relationship with anyone. It’s not that anyone is like dying to be with me considering many of my friends are women or straight men, not very many gay men live around here but regardless, it sucks being alone. I had a long physical relationship with my neighbor since a very young age, but both he and I are in the dark of his orientation because he desires so badly to be straight, and I have every desire to embrace my gay lifestyle, so clearly we’ve been growing apart.

I am starting as a freshman in Philadelphia this year, and so many of the freshman class boys are complete assholes and just so immature and I am so scared about not being able to find a decent gay man who can actually maintain a good relationship. I have found that through this other kid, I have become a very loyal person when it comes to relationships and typically, I am not the hook-up type (minus one exception). What advice can you give me to make me not fear of getting hurt again and actually be able to jump into a new relationship if I find the right guy?

Thank you so much,


Thanks for writing in Brian.

First of all, fuck your neighbor.  Oh, wait, you already did.  Well, don’t keep fucking your neighbor.  You’re young and you can’t afford to be around that self-hating Gay energy.  Homophobia is homophobia, regardless of whether it’s Straight people or Gays spreading the shame around.

I’m not sure exactly the advice you’re seeking, in regards to your fear?  You say that you’re afraid of getting into a relationship, but that it sucks to be alone.  Then you want some sort of advice that will make it okay to ‘jump into’ a relationship again.  I don’t have that.

If it was me, I’d play the field.  I’d go on lots of dates and kiss a few of them and maybe even sleep with some of them, safely.  You’re in college.  The odds are slim that you’re going to find a guy, settle down, and raise a kid.  Why not explore your options?  Seems better than ‘jumping in’ to something.

As for getting hurt?  That’s just the trade off.  There’s never been two people that loved each other without hurting one another pretty deeply sometimes.  I will say this – you get better at recognizing the type of pain you’re willing to receive and inflict, but that takes practice.

Hey Brian – I want to make this clear – it’s still very much worth loving another person.  So if you’re falling in love, please let yourself.

Keep your head up, and stay classy, kiddo.

Or, if you don’t feel classy that day, slut it up.

Love you.  Keep in touch.


p.s.  Please remember that most Gays have a wonderful side.  Acknowledge and encourage that and you can’t go wrong.  That doesn’t mean that every once in a while they won’t act like total…


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